Will and Grace

Operating on sheer willpower alone can compensate for shortcomings in other areas, but I think if you do this long enough, you damage your will centres. Spring your will chakras, just like you overload your adrenals and burn them out..In my case to my surprise my will centres were huge and fast, when they were tested, which I thought was odd, because I feel I have no will/power. Not exactly eye opening. Not healthy.

This changed a couple of weeks ago but it did not last for me. I can only describe it as coming from the Creator, from Spirit, or the Universe, whatever name you choose. I had a "moment" where I felt like I got this big brainwave that I should learn to play the fiddle. Ha! I was never drawn to it in the past. Drawn to the music, yes, but not to learn to play. It was not the usual idle idea...this had something backing it! And at the same time I had great resolve in sticking to a diet, but I lost that too. One could say, so what, people get these motivations/ideas all the time. True, but this was different. And how was it that an art teacher happened to be in the same aisle as me at an odd time of the day..and we got chatting....so now I have an art teacher lined up for later.....But then, this feeling of grace I had......it left me. Then what is left is doubt, doubt that I can learn to play the fiddle, doubt that I am supposed to learn to be an acupuncturist....but yet there is that underpinning of knowing involved...and what else is left?

Wood stock

A w/e trip up to Smeaton to 'borrow' the stradivarius...fog was thick this morning and thought I'd get a pic in of the woodpile before I left, which was stocked up last fall. There's more than enough wood here to keep the folk's house warm all year as well as supply my tentative future retirement home out by Swanson all this winter as well. and then some to sell too. Logging has done well for my uncles in BC and Dad hauling it kept food on the table when I was in high school. Way behind the woodpile is old Benny's rotted log cabin but I didn't feel like plowing snow that far. I should have, since not much chance of bears this time of year. (I say not much chance) cause this is bear country and bears are not true hibernators.